Shifting Perception: how your mindset affects your salon success
Download MP3Good morning, everyone, and welcome to Salon Talk with Nancy. I'm Nancy, and I'm your host. I'm so excited. I can't even believe it. This is episode 12 of season one, and it's a very special episode to me.
Speaker 1:I live by life by these rules. So today, we're gonna be talking about shifting your perception, how your mindset affects your salon success. Final episode for season one. And I wanna thank every one of my guests that was on. I wanna thank my own coaches.
Speaker 1:I wanna thank my listeners and all my family and friends that have supported me. So, you know, this podcast was took a few years in the making, and I'm really excited. And my intention is to elevate, inspire, and empower the beauty professional and any of my listeners, and I hope that through my words and and my guess, you can live a better life. You can be happier, more successful, and empowered. So I just wanna put it out there that this entire podcast is so personal to me because it is an industry that I love being in every day.
Speaker 1:I love the people I'm around. I love my clients, their stylists. They've become friends and family to me, and I just wanna say thank you all for supporting me. So today, we're gonna be talking about shifting your perception, how your mindset affects your salon success, final episode of season one. So I have a question for you.
Speaker 1:Have you ever considered how your perception of a situation may actually be affecting your decisions, the atmosphere of your salon, and even the experience for your guests? Well, today we're going to be exploring the power of perception and how a simple shift in your mindset can not only transform your business, but your personal life as well. So let's start off by just understanding the power of self awareness. So what is self awareness? It's the ability to consciously assess your thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and attributes.
Speaker 1:Little self reflection, please. There are three primary elements of self awareness. One, emotional awareness. This is taking the ability to recognize and understand your own emotions and how they are impacting you, your actions, and the relationships of the people around you, whether it's work or professional. Self reflection, assessing your strength, area of opportunity, and your core values.
Speaker 1:This is all about personal reflection. And then mindfulness, being aware of your present thoughts and emotions enables you to respond thoughtfully rather than impulsively. So I just have to say, being a creative thinker, this was really important to me because when we are creative people, and that is probably the majority of my listeners, when we're creative people, we're very intuitive. And again, I am a licensed hairdresser. I've been doing hair for years, and I love with all my passion when I create a beautiful look on a person.
Speaker 1:And there's nothing more rewarding than them being happy and feeling beautiful when they walk out, you know, when they leave the salon. So we take things very personally, so our emotions play a huge part in how we respond to things. So being learning these skills of self awareness are really going to help you personally and professionally. Well, why is self awareness so important? Alright.
Speaker 1:So it's a vital aspect of our personal and professional growth. It allows us to create empathy and understanding, and these are two key components in working with the public. Clients often struggle with insecurities and need the confidence boost, that's why they're sitting in our chair. By being self aware, we can develop the understanding needed to connect with the client creating the best service possible for them. Adaptability in a fast paced industry such as ours, continued change of trends, techniques, and client demands, self awareness allows us to see and identify our own strengths, Aries also areas of opportunity which enables us to continue to grow and expand.
Speaker 1:And I've said this from day one, true joy lies in the ability to grow and expand. I'm completely convinced and I have said this to many people that when you're unhappy as a person, a human being, it's because you feel trapped. You feel there's no growth, no opportunity that you're trapped, and this is really important to your self growth and expansion as a being. Resilience. The industry can be very demanding and have setbacks that can affect us emotionally.
Speaker 1:We've all had the service where we thought the person was so happy and next thing we know they're getting a call the next day, and they there was an issue and you never even want to recognize it. So that's just one small example, but self awareness allows us to identify an emotion we may be feeling and separate it from who we truly are creating resilience in challenging situations. That I think is very important. And leadership, self awareness is critical when leading a team. By understanding our own leadership styles, we can learn to communicate effectively, manage conflict, which is imperative, and create a positive work environment for everyone involved.
Speaker 1:Did you know a lot of stylists leave because they're unhappy. Right? And even in what I do as a consultant, clients leave brands. I mean, they they'll trust me, there's nothing more challenging and difficult than to do a total color conversion when you have a big team. And really being heard is important.
Speaker 1:Alright? So just wanna point that out. So shifting our perception, how we can see the world is what creates our reality. So how we see the world is what creates our reality. This is an important statement.
Speaker 1:So we need to shift our perception. If we see the world as a negative place, as a place of coming from, a feeling of fear, then every thing we see and how we react to it is going to be coming from this place of fear. Right? So how we see the world is what reflects our reality. This is truth.
Speaker 1:This isn't just a theory. This is truth. So how do you choose to see it? Do you choose to see the world in a in a way that is positive? Do you choose to see the world with a smile on your face and love in your heart?
Speaker 1:Or are you choosing to see a world or your work world in a way where it's you walk in and you're like, I don't wanna be here. I don't wanna service that person. Blah blah blah blah blah. You know, it's everything we do. So usually if somebody's negative in one area of their life, that's a thought process of how they see things, and this usually is a common thread and theme throughout their personal life as well.
Speaker 1:So like I said, changing your perception will not only change the your work environment, it'll change your profession your personal life as well. So how we see the world is what we create is how we create our reality. So how do you choose to see it? Here are a few tips for shifting your mindset and I personally do these. Alright?
Speaker 1:Tell yourself a new story. I remember watching a a TED talk, and this person was an avid snowboarder. And she I don't remember how it happened, but she lost both her legs. Literally lost both her limbs, her legs, and the knees down. And she said something that was so impactful to me.
Speaker 1:She said, if you don't like the way the story of your life is going, Change and rewrite the chapter. So just turn the page because guess what? The future is a blank page. We write our future by the way we perceive the world around us. So I'm gonna tell you, tell yourself a new story.
Speaker 1:Here's some examples, and this one's powerful. I'm just letting you know this is a powerful tip. We all have clients or people in our lives that that are never happy, And they just drain us of our energy, whether it's going to see a in law, a family member, especially around the holidays. If it's your client coming in, you see him on the books and you're like, oh my god. That person sucks the life out of me.
Speaker 1:And when we see their names, you know, we just start with the same old story. Every time she sits in my chair, all she does is complain. I can never make her happy. I don't even know why she comes to me. This sounds familiar.
Speaker 1:Does it not? Or, god, my neighbor is so annoying. And actually, I had this situation. When I first moved into to Rhode Island, I truly was annoyed by my neighbor because they kept talking to me and I just wanted to be left alone. That's because my mother was like that.
Speaker 1:That's another story, let me tell you. And as I changed my perception and told myself another story about the person, everything changed. I'm also gonna use another example. And I have a very good relationship with my ex husband, but there were times of trauma. And I played victim, and so he played bully.
Speaker 1:And I saw him as a bully, and he saw me as a victim. So you see how this went back and forth. Well, the day that I realized that I was no longer a victim, that I was playing victim, that I had didn't have to answer calls, I didn't have to do all this stuff that I was rereading and recreating the chapter over and over again was the day everything changed. I see and I choose to see my ex husband as a great father. He's always there for his kids.
Speaker 1:As a friend, he will never let me fail even to this day. He's thoughtful and he's generous. End of story. That is the chapter I have written, and that is our relationship that is reflected. So I'm telling you, tell yourself another story.
Speaker 1:What if the person sitting in your chair that was on the book that every time she sits in your chair, you tell yourself she's never happy. I don't know why she comes to me. What if you told yourself that I absolutely love being with her because she she allows me instead of saying, you know, all this story of these bad things, I say to myself, you know what? I really like what a good mom she is. Maybe she has kids.
Speaker 1:Maybe she spoils the kids and you just don't agree with it, but you know what? She's a thoughtful, generous mom. Or because the person prebooks, I think, god, she's committed. She's committed to me. She's committed to herself.
Speaker 1:She is a walking advertisement for me. And today, I'm gonna make sure that she gets every everything a 10% of me. And I'm gonna thank her with gratitude. And I and I promise you, if you go in, especially in our industry with a servant mindset that they are you are here to serve them and make them that person feel better and look better, And we have the ability to control the conversation. We don't have to go deep about their complaints.
Speaker 1:We can just keep talking about hair and professional recommendations, and we can take control of the situation. Because when you really look at it, you could see that she's a loyal customer and she comes every four weeks, or you can see the story that she's a she drained you. And you know what? That's the experience you're gonna have with her. So, again, tell yourself another story.
Speaker 1:Change the story. It is the one of the most powerful tips I could give you. Our perception is our reality. Just remember that. Alright.
Speaker 1:Tip number two, and I do this too. Things go away. There's a conflict, let's say, whether it's personal or professional. I I say, what did I learn? What did I learn?
Speaker 1:So tip number two, what did I learn? So when conflict happens, a situation doesn't go as planned, whether it's a new transformation that you were trying to create with a client went a flop. Your creative color didn't quite work out because you didn't realize those were direct dyes or boxed home hair color underneath that fabulous black. Whatever it might be or your meeting went south fast because those things happen to me every once in a while. And you literally are like, what the heck just happened?
Speaker 1:You got dummy punched. When you walk away or your somebody broke up with you even. When you walk away, instead of becoming the blame game and making excuses for your actions and making excuses and creating a story. Right? We're telling a story.
Speaker 1:We're making a story. Now we believe in our emotions, keep going and going and going. How about we stop and we walk away and we go, what did I learn? What was I meant to learn from that situation? So what happens is I just separated my emotion, took it out, and I asked my brain a question, and I asked the logical side of my brain to take over.
Speaker 1:What did I learn? You know, now my brain's gonna start to talk to me, and my emotions are gonna keep in check. So I can make good decisions, and I can see the situation for what it was. This is another one. Instead of saying, when you're decompressing after you're like, oh, it's a blame game.
Speaker 1:It's me against them, you just stop and you say, what did I learn? What did I learn? Okay. Tip number three, people. I call it identify your warm zone.
Speaker 1:And this means and I practice this. Okay? Identify your warm zone. This takes a little practice, but once you master it, I'm telling you it's good as gold. So I want you to imagine you're talking to someone.
Speaker 1:I don't care if it's your spouse, it's a peer, it's a client, it's an employee, a client. I don't care. You're talking to somebody and all of a sudden they're saying something and you can feel it bubbling. You can feel it's starting. The emotions are gonna get high.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna give you an example in a second. When that starts happening, when it's a low simmer before it gets to a boil you know, when it when water boils and it starts to steam first? So I want you to, like that's your warm zone. If the water's warming up, it's starting to steam, it's starting to steam, and then you start to see a bubble then two bubbles, and all of a sudden it's like, you're bubbled over. Find your warm zone.
Speaker 1:So So when you identify your warm zone, when you can feel your emotions getting high, you're gonna stop. And here are some things you can do depending on the situation. You can ask the person. If they keep coming at you wanting an answer, wanting an answer, you can go, here's a good one. And it's totally fair you can say it.
Speaker 1:And I've said it to managers. You know what? That's a great question. Let me get back to you. Can I have twenty four hours to get back to you?
Speaker 1:Okay. So now I'm asking the person, I'm I'm taking control of the situation of my own emotions. I'm pausing. I'm just pausing before my emotions get high. So I want you to think of it like this, like a scale, a balance.
Speaker 1:Here's your balance. When emotions are high, logic gets low. So we start making decisions that are not the best decisions. We start making decisions out of a place of fear, out of anger. These are all negative things.
Speaker 1:Right? So we wanna make logical decisions so that's why when you ask yourself the question, what did I learn? What happens? The scale on the logic side starts going up, and my scale of my emotion goes down. Right?
Speaker 1:So in the world, when we can see things logically, we can see things for what they are. It's still our perception, but it's you have a much better chance of finding a mutual solution and creating a positive environment than when your emotions are high when they're negative. Okay? Alright. So you can ask for a pause.
Speaker 1:That's a good one. Another thing. Here's another good one, actually. Wait. One more.
Speaker 1:You can excuse yourself, and I've had this one happen. You can excuse yourself and just go to the bathroom. So I had an example of one time I was speaking to somebody, and they literally started to personally, like like, went from zero to a hundred like that. And they started to make accusations at me, and I had no idea what they were talking about. And it was so negative so fast.
Speaker 1:I actually wanted to start crying. So what I did was, as this person was emotionally and verbally coming at me, because it happened so fast, I couldn't identify my warm zone because it went from zero to a thousand in one second. I said I just said, oh my god. I have to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back.
Speaker 1:Went to the bathroom, literally sat, just went into the stall, sat on the toilet, like, didn't I did not have to go to the bathroom, and I cried. And I started to breathe and just breathe and focus on my breath so my heart rate came down and I could actually start to think logically about what was happening. Because sometimes we miss something. Sometimes we don't realize that we an action of ours affected somebody that much. So I went back to recheck my emails to see if I was made a mistake.
Speaker 1:I did not. I just want to point out I did not. So I was like, okay. This is like the person seriously like, there's something more to this and we need to go it's, you know, look past the emotion. There's more to this relationship than that.
Speaker 1:Alright? So we're not him against her. I'm bringing my emotions down. I'm not playing victim, and I'm not allowing someone to bully me. I'm excusing myself from a situation so I can clear my head and bring my emotions down.
Speaker 1:And then here's my favorite, and this actually works, especially for people who have to work in the public. I don't care what you do. If you have to work with people, you especially a big diversity of people. Again, you don't know what you're walking into. That person before they walked through those doors to sit in your chair or to sit across from you in a meeting or to sit next to you at church or to or, you know, whatever happened, they could have just gotten a phone call or even a text as they were walking in, and they their spouse, their partner could be leaving them.
Speaker 1:And they're like, oh my god. What happened? Or they could just find out, you know, found out that like, they bounced a check and it was really important. Whatever it is. I don't know.
Speaker 1:We don't know. You don't know the circumstances. So and you don't know past experiences too. So remember, we make decisions based on past experiences. So here is my favorite because I have to do this in meetings all the time, especially if a client is not happy and I'm just the face of the distributor and the consultant and they're have to vent somebody.
Speaker 1:My favorite thing to do, especially if I know that the person has a short fuse, I imagine that I have the shield in front of me. That this shield because I when I was a little girl, I always wanted to be Wonder Woman. I wanted to be a superhero. So, like, this truly works, Rene. You can imagine because our mind is that powerful that we have a shield.
Speaker 1:Okay? And the shield is in front of us, and that this shield is gonna protect us from emotions because emotions and words are energy. So when somebody's coming at you with a negative energy, even if the words, because we've all had condescending people that, you know, like, passive aggressive with their words aren't mean words, but you know the energy and the tone behind them are, and that they're meant to be hurtful. So just imagine that the energy isn't at you, it's being reflected. So this allows the person to express their feelings at whatever emotion is resonating with them, because I can't control them, I can only influence them.
Speaker 1:And what happens is when you just you say tell me more. Tell me more. You don't have to say I agree with you because you don't even know the situate you know, you weren't there. Tell me more. And what happens is the more it's like when we have a conversation with our best friend and we just wanna vent about our husband or boyfriend or whatever, I always say, just let me vent because at the end, I'm just gonna feel better and then I'm gonna, like, we can talk about it.
Speaker 1:So bring it allows them to get it all out and bring their energy down. So again, remember the scale of emotions are high, logic is low. So if you allow somebody to to it's like a balloon, get rid of the energy, the negative energy that's built up, then eventually, they're gonna actually feel better, and they're gonna balance themselves out. So in the interim, you can imagine that there's like a shield, and like it's not affecting me. These are just I'm just here to allow the person to vent, but I'm not gonna take the energy on because it really wasn't about me.
Speaker 1:So those are three tips that work very, very well, and those are real strategies. They're real strategies that I've personally used and that I've learned. I am actually a psychology major, just so you know. I went to college when I was a grown up. I always tell my kids I was 32, and I signed up for college.
Speaker 1:I got a bachelor's degree. And psychology was my favorite. Okay. So and then my final one is start your day with gratitude. Alright?
Speaker 1:So if you were to list in the morning or and this has to do with another episode I met I did on living your life with purpose. If you start your morning every day before you even put your feet on the floor, you open your eyes, all you have to do is say, thank you, universe, that today is gonna be the greatest day ever. Right? And another trick before you go to bed, thank you, God, for this beautiful day that I've had. And I know tomorrow I'm gonna wake up and I'm gonna have the answers for everything.
Speaker 1:And I'm gonna be a blessing to all my customers or I'm gonna be whatever you want it to be. So so you're gonna start your day, and you're gonna end your day wanting to to make the next day whatever it's gonna be. So your alarm goes off, you're gonna start your day with gratitude. Now some people I'm gonna recommend before you even put your feet on the floor because I do this. And, again, everyone knows that knows me, I actually live a really joyful life.
Speaker 1:So start your day with gratitude. I also journal. You can list of things because writing there's there's something to the writing part, but you can also just say it out loud. You can say, list all the things that you're grateful for, and what's gonna happen is you're gonna retrain your mind. So the more that you are thinking thoughts of gratitude So whenever I'm mad at my husband, I always think of three things that I love the most about him because then I all of a sudden shift my mindset.
Speaker 1:I'm no longer annoyed by him. I mean, trust me. It's a little trick that I do, and it's a good one. I do it with everyone. So you're you're what you're doing is you're thinking gratitude, gratitude, gratitude.
Speaker 1:You're gonna be happy for your husband. You're gonna be happy for your partner. You're gonna be happy for the food on your plate. You're gonna be happy for your job. You're gonna be happy for your clients.
Speaker 1:You're gonna be happy for like, there are so many things you could be grateful for. There are so many people that have nothing, not even food to eat. And and here we are not being having gratitude for all the beautiful things we have. Even if you have just change in your pocket, you still have money. You should be grateful for that.
Speaker 1:So what happens is when you train your mind to see things with gratitude, you're starting to see the good in all in all situations. So couple things, reflecting back, what did I learn? Right? I'm not playing victim. I'm not at me against that person.
Speaker 1:It's what did I learn. I'm just seeing it as a situation, takes the emotion out of it. This one is I'm retraining my brain so I see gratitude with things. So when a situation does arise, a, my energy is gonna be high, and it's gonna be happy filled with gratitude. And I'm gonna tell you, it's gonna take a lot more than you just not liking me to get me off this block of happiness.
Speaker 1:So you'll be surprised in how this one positively actually positively impacts everyone around you. So imagine if you started your day off already grateful for things with high energy and happiness, when you walk into work and you you don't even realize you have a smile on your face, and you're gonna be happy for your job and your clients, I promise you, you will see things in a different light. Alright? So creating so I hope all this was helpful, everyone. I do all of these.
Speaker 1:Check. Check. Check. Check. Alright.
Speaker 1:Creating a positive salon environment for all because my audience wear salons. Right? So how do how does this really affect us? So creating a positive salon, environment for all. When here's the thing.
Speaker 1:This is key. When each one of us, each person, I'm talking to you, the listener, and I want you to share this with everyone you know. Because I'm I know that if we each each one of us strengthened our ability of self awareness, we could literally change an entire culture of people. We could change the world. I'm not even kidding.
Speaker 1:When we each take the time to pause and identify how our own actions, choices, and words impact the people around us, then we are all purposely creating. Alright? When we all when each person and it starts with you. You are not responsible for other people. It starts with you.
Speaker 1:When we each take the time to pause and identify how our own actions, choices, and words impact the people around us, then we are purposely creating. That is key. When we purposely create, we cannot only separate the situation from the person, but we can actually be a difference maker in the lives of our team, our clients, our family, our friends, and the community around us. Let me repeat that. When we purposely create, we cannot only separate the situation from the person, but we can actually be a difference maker in the lives of our team, our clients, our family, our friends, and the community around us.
Speaker 1:This is true. So remember, the only thing we have control over is our own perception. So choose wisely, my friend. I encourage you to reflect on your own personal, perceptions and strive to become more, to love more, and to lead by positive examples. Whether you're a salon owner, a stylist, an independent, a mom, a dad, a single person that lives in a community, I encourage you to reflect on your own perceptions of how you see the world and strive to become more, to love more, and to lead by positive example.
Speaker 1:I wanna thank you for tuning in to my podcast, Salon Talk with Nancy. I invite you to share this, to comment, to subscribe, to tell people around you about this, to take what we just went through, and to actually take it seriously, and to take steps one practice at a time, I promise you will change your life. And I want for everyone to feel the way I feel, to live a life with joy, to live a life filled with success success and prosperity, to build a light to live a life with purpose, and to see the greatest potential in each other. So thank you again for joining me in my podcast, Long Talk with Nancy. Please feel free to follow me on social media, and I'd really like you to share your own experiences that you have by what you've learned, by your own past experiences of just taking one or two key things and share it with me.
Speaker 1:You can always email me at salontalkwithNancy@Gmail. I'd love to hear your story. I'm gonna take the next three months, and I'm going to be reaching out to salon professionals. So if you get somebody gets a message from me, don't be surprised. And I'd really like feedback, and I'd like to hear what some of your biggest challenges are.
Speaker 1:What you'd like to hear about and learn about and real feedback. And you're gonna help me develop the next episodes. And I really have invited some great great, artists and icons, of course, to be a part of my show. So I'm excited for season two, And I'm going to be starting to reach out and pull all that together. So, please share this podcast with people.
Speaker 1:It's on Apple. It's on Spotify. Share it with your friends and your family, but most of all, take the suggestions and try to implement them so you can live your best life ever. That is truly my intention. So I want to say thank you to each and every one of you for listening, for being a part of this, and I want you all to have the greatest, happiest life ever.
Speaker 1:Thank you for joining me. Thank you. I appreciate you all. Have a wonderful day, and I'll see you in season two. Bye.
